http://catholicism.about.com/cs/sex/f/sexfaqaccept.htm
No, No, I'm actually Laughing out Loud! After reading this.
All I can think to say to you the reader is: Can you bear it? ha!
Sometimes I really find it hard to defend my Catholic faith - and it’s not about my belief in God or anything like that( -I'm very secure and happy with my lord and saviour Jesus Christ!
Dahling my issue isn’t with God it’s with the Vatican ;) and all of the Man made church rules... or more so the rigidity of the rules, and why there is seemingly no leeway at all????
FYI- according to this rant:
Apparently, 'Homosexuality' my dear is a tendency in case you didn't know, yes and apparently THE CHURCH believes you will grow out of it...(?!) but don't worry - being Gay isn't a sin, - unless of course you actually like someone and do something about it ( ?! )
Its such a sham really it is - Ok, Ok, the ''no sex before marriage'' part I actually agree with - but really that particular line - had me in hysterics!!!
In fact I will be checking with folk to see if you know what I found the most hysterical line.
But a final thought, from the young 20-something year old girl with the tight clothes, hoping to find a hot -ass 'Mr' to Rock her... (Boat ?!!) ha! -in fact let me just pose the question:
Is it ANY wonder that the Catholic church struggles to keep young people attending with a stance as rigid as that?
Whatever people believe is what they believe- and I'm CERTAINLY NOT sending this to steer any one in any direction or influence any opinions !!
I'm simply posting it because I was in hysterics at a particular line and I want to know if any reader can guess what it was - answers on a postcard please... (or in the comments section rather)
L xxx-xxx-x!!
''Always remember
That too much of a Good thing can be BAD... '' hahaha
See you all at Confession.... x
Thursday 17 November 2011
Tuesday 1 November 2011
Wednesday 27 April 2011
The best damn advice I've ever given- and you've ever read haha
If I know anything, its that the only person who can alleviate the drama for you- will ultimately be YOU. As bleak as that is! Of course friends provide the distraction and may help take your mind off things (and the power of that is never to be underestimated) but anything that is substantially painful and hurting you can only be fully removed by you...
But I have learned that almost everything that happens in our lives is a DIRECT result of our own behaviours. Well that and God if you ask me - but for the non religious folk, I think the power of the self fulfilling prophecy , must never be forgotten. Do you know what I mean?
Its like if we tell ourselves that our life is a complete mess and overwhelmingly awful and impossible to get through - then it sure as hell it will be.
Words are so powerful. I think that its isn't as simple as saying : '' Im great - and so happy '' and then magically changing things to be that way but I believe by saying : '' Im going to be okay- this too shall pass, Im going to get through this period in my life and I'll feel better in the morning'' etc, etc It will help lessen the burden your carrying. Because you are choosing to look at the glass half full.
U know Im a realist, so if the day is a bad one- I aint gonna lie- what's the point? However when I went through some of the hardest points in my life in '07- nearly collapsing from overwork being immersed in unhappiness because I am drowning in debt etc, etc - the only thing that eventually got me to a better place about it all was that I changed my PERSPECTIVE. The overworked situ remains - the freakin debt remains but the unhappiness doesn't.
In the serenity prayer that I say every night, it has a line which says :
'' Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time and accepting hardship as the pathway to peace ''
and u know I try and remember that continually through all the nonsense and drama.
If I deal with just that day and dont think and definitely DO NOT SAY: ' Oh God Im working a 7-day week this week and I wont get a break until next Sunday ' etc, etc then guess what? Somehow I get through Monday.
And the slightest small moment of joy, I acknowledge and am grateful for (even if its a trivial sham like wedges are back at Mickey D's and I love 'em - and I can remember when I had zero pence in my accounts and could not even contemplate buying fast food because I couldnt afford to waste the £3 quid!) You know?
And in the bleakest moments, I somewhere inside of me try to think that ' EVERYTHING happens for a reason - and I'll grow from this and learn a valuable lesson. What doesn't kill me makes me stronger, its always darkest before the dawn and a million other anecdotes like it! And that is even when I dont really believe it at the time! ha! But clearly something in my thinking has the ability to change my situation. Because strangely all of sudden you wake up and its like : '' Sh1t I got through that! Remember when I was coming home from Job 1 getting under the covers and just trying to sleep because I was so freakin depressed?! '' But you have come through to the other side and u dont remember how or when , but you know that you did because you remember the tears you shed when you were at your lowest.
You will come through all things - you have to have the faith- you have to remember all the good in your life and focus on that - you have to read stories from people who have triumphed over adversity much, much greater than your own and by comparison see just how surmountable your TEMPORARY upsets can be.
''If you want something you have never had - you must do something you have never done '' and I think you may if you change your outlook on things and deal with your dramas in a completely different way than you usually do, you will get a different outcome than all the other times.
It aint easy but I have faith in folks and please know that if Pain was a handbag weighing you down Id offer to help you carry it if I could :-)
xx-xxx-xx
But I have learned that almost everything that happens in our lives is a DIRECT result of our own behaviours. Well that and God if you ask me - but for the non religious folk, I think the power of the self fulfilling prophecy , must never be forgotten. Do you know what I mean?
Its like if we tell ourselves that our life is a complete mess and overwhelmingly awful and impossible to get through - then it sure as hell it will be.
Words are so powerful. I think that its isn't as simple as saying : '' Im great - and so happy '' and then magically changing things to be that way but I believe by saying : '' Im going to be okay- this too shall pass, Im going to get through this period in my life and I'll feel better in the morning'' etc, etc It will help lessen the burden your carrying. Because you are choosing to look at the glass half full.
U know Im a realist, so if the day is a bad one- I aint gonna lie- what's the point? However when I went through some of the hardest points in my life in '07- nearly collapsing from overwork being immersed in unhappiness because I am drowning in debt etc, etc - the only thing that eventually got me to a better place about it all was that I changed my PERSPECTIVE. The overworked situ remains - the freakin debt remains but the unhappiness doesn't.
In the serenity prayer that I say every night, it has a line which says :
'' Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time and accepting hardship as the pathway to peace ''
and u know I try and remember that continually through all the nonsense and drama.
If I deal with just that day and dont think and definitely DO NOT SAY: ' Oh God Im working a 7-day week this week and I wont get a break until next Sunday ' etc, etc then guess what? Somehow I get through Monday.
And the slightest small moment of joy, I acknowledge and am grateful for (even if its a trivial sham like wedges are back at Mickey D's and I love 'em - and I can remember when I had zero pence in my accounts and could not even contemplate buying fast food because I couldnt afford to waste the £3 quid!) You know?
And in the bleakest moments, I somewhere inside of me try to think that ' EVERYTHING happens for a reason - and I'll grow from this and learn a valuable lesson. What doesn't kill me makes me stronger, its always darkest before the dawn and a million other anecdotes like it! And that is even when I dont really believe it at the time! ha! But clearly something in my thinking has the ability to change my situation. Because strangely all of sudden you wake up and its like : '' Sh1t I got through that! Remember when I was coming home from Job 1 getting under the covers and just trying to sleep because I was so freakin depressed?! '' But you have come through to the other side and u dont remember how or when , but you know that you did because you remember the tears you shed when you were at your lowest.
You will come through all things - you have to have the faith- you have to remember all the good in your life and focus on that - you have to read stories from people who have triumphed over adversity much, much greater than your own and by comparison see just how surmountable your TEMPORARY upsets can be.
''If you want something you have never had - you must do something you have never done '' and I think you may if you change your outlook on things and deal with your dramas in a completely different way than you usually do, you will get a different outcome than all the other times.
It aint easy but I have faith in folks and please know that if Pain was a handbag weighing you down Id offer to help you carry it if I could :-)
xx-xxx-xx
Tuesday 26 April 2011
Best relationship blog I wrote in 2009
Let me start with : IT AIN'T OVER.
Mostly everybody knew my the game plan- date 2 ( that is all we are on and yes , yes I know that the dramas we've endured ALREADY would make u think it was more right? haha) Anyhoo the date at 'the local' was goin to provide tangible proof of the fact that we dont really work.
Which to be honest is still true!! I think.. I dont know what I think anymore... to be honest I still feel drunk from last night...( which is no shocker considering, I arrived a little inebriated right Darling
haha and then from what I remember, had 3 glasses of wine on top of that! So when I went to bed at, I think it was 3ish? and then woke up again @ 7.30- I could hardly remember my name, let alone where I stood on mine & Matt's 'moment'(?) I dont even know what to call it....)
Anyhoooooooo - the date... well it didnt go according to plan.
In fact I deviated so much from the original plan, that a new plan, that resembles what actually happened last night , needs to be drawn up...
SO folks .... it will come as no shock to u my darlings, (since ya know me quite well in fact and have met me once or twice ;-) and have probably been with me when Im lets say...um, Not sober? haha) when I tell u what happened last night. So to put it in a sentence (that will make a mockery of the anticipation I just built up in that wonderful sham of an introduction)
At the local ... your girl LL killed it ;-) hahaha
I mean the crowd loved me what can I say? hahaha
Seriously folks at ' the well ' became my new friends and I mean they were lovely - just such lovely, lovely, real folks.
I loved it. Well I didn't love it - I loved the night - I loved the people- I loved that Matt said I made him so proud, (pls bypass that particular and kp readin, cos it gets better than that... haha) and that now he wants me to meet his best mate, and that everyone loved me, everyone told him, that ' Im so nice and he seems so happy with me- yes all those things I loved.
Didn't love the fact that someone called me Matt Missus' (Oh yes that is right - someone shouted from over the other side of the bar- '' dont say that John that Matt's Missus ''
I mean whilst u take a moment to take that in - and I take a second to ' take a deep breath , count ten and move on, even though it seems like the end of the world has come....' you should know that in 'the Well' - that is standard fare and its just a turn o' phrase. Right?
Right?!!! RIGHT. So no need for concern.
No need at all.
Im sorry - I think I NEED SOME AIR AND PREFERABLY A VERY STRONG DRINK... But that particular heckler from the crowd, really was indicative of the rest of the audience ( 'Life is a stage' darling didn't u know?haha) what I didn't realise until the end of the night, was being there last night was a test .
It was like , if you could u make it there - u could make it anywhere .
Because to pass in there with the folks who ADORE him, then you've made it.
If that is your goal of course - to make it with Mstt - which to be honest I dont know what my goal actually is - but in any case it seems I passed with flying colours.
They were some of the friendliest people I've had the pleasure of meeting- truly.
However I realise now, that behind those innocent questions like; so is this your first time in Heywood ?'In here its like ' Cheers' where evrybody knows your name - what do u think of us lot then? ' Matt is the loveliest bloke you could ever meet - he's like my son' ' so why were u 40minutes late ? ' was a board vetting me like a PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE. I was bein graded from the moment I stepped in there and Im relieved (?) to say I gave the correct answers and there were no complaints! hahaha!
Because, well, look u all know me and how I do!!! I was chatting on - to EVERYONE. (freakin shocker....)
Alan ( his mate who runs the pub- and whose like his dad was so sweet to me, there were two Steve's , there was Julie & Phil , erm there was Emma she was Tall Steve's 'missus' (Im getting quite used to that word actually...) my fave was Roy - who just killed it - I was in complete stitches with these people.. Then I was chatting to another Alan - this one is the village's resident alcoholic, but everyone loves him, u know the type. We had a very interesting conversation about the economy being in direstraits, interspersed with me asking if that was actually 6 litres of cider in the carrier bag he had with him... Then I was getting Matt to give me money so I can put songs on in the jukebox- Human Nature ( if I can bring some Michael to a party: I WILL. And that's why we love Thriller because its a staple album that even a dump in Heywood will have on the jukebox. Someone, much to my delight, brought 'Hero' to the table , altho I've never heard Mariah played after 'Wonderwall' before - and Im not sure I ever will again... about 4 people had to show me how to use the damn thing because Mr. White had left me to it at this point ( I mean to be honest, I prefer to work a room unaided anyway... )
At one point I was hungry and Roy had told me that I would love the Chinese restaurant Hoyas - then it turned out to be closed and my dreams of special fried rice were almost shattered- ( to be fair on Roy he apologised profusely ) until someone suggested the take out down the street. Alan said he'd turn a blind eye to me scranning in the pub so off we went. I mean u know its a sign of a good night when the £1.50 u went out with comes home with you, accompanied by Chinese fried rice and two copy DVD's that little Steve said were ' really high quality, they just dont have cases ... '' and you can keep the change of the £30 he just gave you to get homw in the taxi ;-)
So after we were literally the very last people to leave the pub - we went with Alan to some other place that was havin an illegal lock in - which initially turned us away,
( yes that's right - a complete dive in Heywood were saying - ' No mate, we've stopped letting ppl in now...' FYI: there were actually 3 people- incl. me- inside. Anyhoo... )
but then because Emma ( who later treated us all to a powerful rendition of 'Valerie' by Amy W. ) thinks Matt is gooooooooorgeous and she knows the bouncers, had a word and they let us in. How nice.
NB. Its allllllllllllll about who u know in Heywood - dont get it twisted. ;-) ha!
Dont even know what time we left and Im just grateful the boy got me home when he did otherwise Id be still stuck listening to Emma belting out her favourite Karaoke moments...
So to bring the essay to a close... It was a completely farcical moment - I was very drunk and when I woke up STILL drunk all I could really do was laugh! I had a great night ( oh and for anyone that is thinking, I've omitted the details of the physical components of the date -IVE NOT! Ha! Just dont wana gross everyone out with unnecessary details though, the story of the date, line-by-line is punishment enough... but just know there was plenty of it and it was all very lovely. )
And whilst the wishing well is a pub I wouldnt go back to in a hurry- it was nowhere near as bad as expected. And also now everyone wants me to go back... Im sure I'll c it again.
At one point whilst appropriately singing ' Happy Birthday ' to some guy whose birthday is SEPT 27th NEXT YEAR , and being told I should come back to their weekly ' jam session ' on Thurs, because Tall Steve can play Guitar quite well - and that I should go on ' x factor ' cos Id win,
I thought :
U know, its not that bad.
Is it?????????
Love ya all for readin this mess - what would I be without ya??? ( That questions rhetorical btw )
L xx-xxx-xx
Mostly everybody knew my the game plan- date 2 ( that is all we are on and yes , yes I know that the dramas we've endured ALREADY would make u think it was more right? haha) Anyhoo the date at 'the local' was goin to provide tangible proof of the fact that we dont really work.
Which to be honest is still true!! I think.. I dont know what I think anymore... to be honest I still feel drunk from last night...( which is no shocker considering, I arrived a little inebriated right Darling
haha and then from what I remember, had 3 glasses of wine on top of that! So when I went to bed at, I think it was 3ish? and then woke up again @ 7.30- I could hardly remember my name, let alone where I stood on mine & Matt's 'moment'(?) I dont even know what to call it....) Anyhoooooooo - the date... well it didnt go according to plan.
In fact I deviated so much from the original plan, that a new plan, that resembles what actually happened last night , needs to be drawn up...
SO folks .... it will come as no shock to u my darlings, (since ya know me quite well in fact and have met me once or twice ;-) and have probably been with me when Im lets say...um, Not sober? haha) when I tell u what happened last night. So to put it in a sentence (that will make a mockery of the anticipation I just built up in that wonderful sham of an introduction)
At the local ... your girl LL killed it ;-) hahaha
I mean the crowd loved me what can I say? hahaha
Seriously folks at ' the well ' became my new friends and I mean they were lovely - just such lovely, lovely, real folks.
I loved it. Well I didn't love it - I loved the night - I loved the people- I loved that Matt said I made him so proud, (pls bypass that particular and kp readin, cos it gets better than that... haha) and that now he wants me to meet his best mate, and that everyone loved me, everyone told him, that ' Im so nice and he seems so happy with me- yes all those things I loved.
Didn't love the fact that someone called me Matt Missus' (Oh yes that is right - someone shouted from over the other side of the bar- '' dont say that John that Matt's Missus ''
I mean whilst u take a moment to take that in - and I take a second to ' take a deep breath , count ten and move on, even though it seems like the end of the world has come....' you should know that in 'the Well' - that is standard fare and its just a turn o' phrase. Right?
Right?!!! RIGHT. So no need for concern.
No need at all.
Im sorry - I think I NEED SOME AIR AND PREFERABLY A VERY STRONG DRINK... But that particular heckler from the crowd, really was indicative of the rest of the audience ( 'Life is a stage' darling didn't u know?haha) what I didn't realise until the end of the night, was being there last night was a test .
It was like , if you could u make it there - u could make it anywhere .
Because to pass in there with the folks who ADORE him, then you've made it.
If that is your goal of course - to make it with Mstt - which to be honest I dont know what my goal actually is - but in any case it seems I passed with flying colours.
They were some of the friendliest people I've had the pleasure of meeting- truly.
However I realise now, that behind those innocent questions like; so is this your first time in Heywood ?'In here its like ' Cheers' where evrybody knows your name - what do u think of us lot then? ' Matt is the loveliest bloke you could ever meet - he's like my son' ' so why were u 40minutes late ? ' was a board vetting me like a PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE. I was bein graded from the moment I stepped in there and Im relieved (?) to say I gave the correct answers and there were no complaints! hahaha!
Because, well, look u all know me and how I do!!! I was chatting on - to EVERYONE. (freakin shocker....)
Alan ( his mate who runs the pub- and whose like his dad was so sweet to me, there were two Steve's , there was Julie & Phil , erm there was Emma she was Tall Steve's 'missus' (Im getting quite used to that word actually...) my fave was Roy - who just killed it - I was in complete stitches with these people.. Then I was chatting to another Alan - this one is the village's resident alcoholic, but everyone loves him, u know the type. We had a very interesting conversation about the economy being in direstraits, interspersed with me asking if that was actually 6 litres of cider in the carrier bag he had with him... Then I was getting Matt to give me money so I can put songs on in the jukebox- Human Nature ( if I can bring some Michael to a party: I WILL. And that's why we love Thriller because its a staple album that even a dump in Heywood will have on the jukebox. Someone, much to my delight, brought 'Hero' to the table , altho I've never heard Mariah played after 'Wonderwall' before - and Im not sure I ever will again... about 4 people had to show me how to use the damn thing because Mr. White had left me to it at this point ( I mean to be honest, I prefer to work a room unaided anyway... )
At one point I was hungry and Roy had told me that I would love the Chinese restaurant Hoyas - then it turned out to be closed and my dreams of special fried rice were almost shattered- ( to be fair on Roy he apologised profusely ) until someone suggested the take out down the street. Alan said he'd turn a blind eye to me scranning in the pub so off we went. I mean u know its a sign of a good night when the £1.50 u went out with comes home with you, accompanied by Chinese fried rice and two copy DVD's that little Steve said were ' really high quality, they just dont have cases ... '' and you can keep the change of the £30 he just gave you to get homw in the taxi ;-)
So after we were literally the very last people to leave the pub - we went with Alan to some other place that was havin an illegal lock in - which initially turned us away,
( yes that's right - a complete dive in Heywood were saying - ' No mate, we've stopped letting ppl in now...' FYI: there were actually 3 people- incl. me- inside. Anyhoo... )
but then because Emma ( who later treated us all to a powerful rendition of 'Valerie' by Amy W. ) thinks Matt is gooooooooorgeous and she knows the bouncers, had a word and they let us in. How nice.
NB. Its allllllllllllll about who u know in Heywood - dont get it twisted. ;-) ha!
Dont even know what time we left and Im just grateful the boy got me home when he did otherwise Id be still stuck listening to Emma belting out her favourite Karaoke moments...
So to bring the essay to a close... It was a completely farcical moment - I was very drunk and when I woke up STILL drunk all I could really do was laugh! I had a great night ( oh and for anyone that is thinking, I've omitted the details of the physical components of the date -IVE NOT! Ha! Just dont wana gross everyone out with unnecessary details though, the story of the date, line-by-line is punishment enough... but just know there was plenty of it and it was all very lovely. )
And whilst the wishing well is a pub I wouldnt go back to in a hurry- it was nowhere near as bad as expected. And also now everyone wants me to go back... Im sure I'll c it again.
At one point whilst appropriately singing ' Happy Birthday ' to some guy whose birthday is SEPT 27th NEXT YEAR , and being told I should come back to their weekly ' jam session ' on Thurs, because Tall Steve can play Guitar quite well - and that I should go on ' x factor ' cos Id win,
I thought :
U know, its not that bad.
Is it?????????
Love ya all for readin this mess - what would I be without ya??? ( That questions rhetorical btw )
L xx-xxx-xx
Best blog I wrote in 2007
So let me just start with this word : LENT.
Yes people L-E-N- to the T.
Lent.
Lent (lĕnt)
n.
n.
The 40 weekdays from Ash Wednesday until Easter observed by Christians as a season of fasting and penitence in preparation for Easter.
Now technically it’s kind of a sin for me to go round telling folks what I have given up and the Bible says something to the effect of ‘if you are fasting (NB. In Lent you should be doing 3 things: Fasting, Almsgiving aka Charity , and Prayer) don’t go around looking depressed and hungry’ ( Im paraphrasing naturally ) and ‘ if you are almsgiving don’t go shouting from the rooftops how freakin generous you are’ because then you are doing it for the wrong reasons.
It isn’t about being lauded and complimented for the good you are doing by helping others- but yet it is about helping others- Comprehende? If you are doing things you make yortself appear better to others then you have missed the point of what Lent is really about.
That is the backstory – the reason im telling anyone who’ll listen that I have been forced into giving up alcohol for Lent is simply because I want sympathy.
I don’t know what the Bible says about that and frankly I don’t wanna know – because Im sure it revolves around me not complaining to people about my current situ- and as you can see Im in direct opposition to that particular way of thinking…
Anyhoo my Darling MySpace-supremo of a Sister- George aka Diva G (?!... No I Love the name reeeeeeally! ) pipes up that she thought it: ‘ would be a good idea for me to stop drinking’
Yes that’s right, youi heard me – she said:
‘ a GOOD idea for me to GIVE up drinking for Lent’
QuÉ ?!
People pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeee bear in mind I have a glass (or five) of Champagne- not exactly hard liquor is it? AND if you saw the teeny-weeny size of the glass.. BESIDES I only have them when I go out and that ( of recent anyway) is like twice a week- hardly a bottle a night…anyhooooooo…
So Obviously I INSTANTLY 86’d the idea.
No, No, NO- I was going to start doing something extra for Lent instead.
Yes, something like… Stop arguing with my sister, or eat less chocolate or help old ladies cross the road- you know the achievable (yet-just-as-meaningful ) Lentern promises that are easy to keep!
So I thought it was over until later at the family dinner it is brought to the table once more by my (insert own choice of word here ) sibling Georgie dearest…
But to my horror the suggestion of me giving up my fave friend Veuve Cliqueot is greeted with resounding cries and cheers in agreement???!!
Even my ingénue of a younger sister – thinks it would be ‘’ WISE’’ ?! ( She’s ten- and I’m confused…)
Hold up one freakin second!!
My life, I repeat MY life, had all of sudden become fodder for the critical mass !!
I should freakin think not! but as I desperately struggled to defend my inalienable, well-earned, well-deserved, basic human right to consume alcohol 2x a week- and fought back disturbing suggestions like ‘’ Maybe if you just reduced your intake….’’ I realised that I had become in my
I mean I felt like I was the star of my own A&E INTERVENTION or something , at anyt given point I expected some sort of drill sergeant to pack me off to a camp for kids who misbehave. It was outrageous – I mean they are telling all this to me.
ME!! The closest living relative of the Virgin Mary for God’s sake!
( And before you start - Of course I'm not taking the Lord’s name in vain ! We are distantly related Dahling so it doesn’t count... ) ( And if you're thinking I just abolished my love & respect for the Lord, by just taking his name in vain- you would be right. Thanks for noticing and I'll be sure to ask for your opinion again...
) Anyhooooo where was I? Oh yes the family suggestions... well they were abhorrent to me and seriously disturbing. Then I had a Lightbulb moment ( shout out to Oprah for coining that phrase )
I realised that the more I argued, the more I convinced them that I needed to quit drinking – for 6 weeks anyway.
Because believe me - when IN MY DEFENCE - I was putting forward arguments like '' my social life will be over..'' the ghastly expressions in the Jury- I mean family - said it all.
So I have been on this Lenten journey of no alcohol ( EXCL. Sundays – THANK the LORD himself, we only have to do 40 days like Jesus did and not 45 like the calendar stretches Lent out to be ) for 3 very loooooong weeks – but just by venting my (obvious) frustration, I can see now that the suggestion was well needed and looooong overdue.
I realise now that perhaps my attachment to Champagne and the festivities that come with it, were clearly being enjoyed a tad too much.
And I guess you can actually have too much of a good thing? Maybe, I dont really know , certainly there is such a thing as excess- and Lord knows I have the Visa bills to prove it…
Even as I type, Im surprised that I have even arrived at such an interesting conclusion.
But its simply because I arrived at this conclusion, that I thought - I would share it ( with as many people as could bear to read it ).
And If you learnt something from it , then ....( please tell me what it was because even I'm lost now) . NO really – if you learnt something. Great.
If you didn't - it doesn't really matter – because I DID.
best blog I wrote in 2009
Welcome to the 2009 edition ( they actually DO - do one every year...) of getting to know your friends and family.
What you are supposed to do is copy (not forward) this entire e-mail and paste onto a new e-mail that you'll send. Change all the answers so they apply to you, and then send this to a whole bunch of people including the person who sent it to you ( well.... I kinda re-sent it to myself - so noone else to blame this time haha) The theory is that you will learn a lot of little things about your friends and family, if you did not know them already Well trust me if u know me - u'll probably know the answers to these questions because the wonderful about me is, I remain consistent - so really the answers wont differ that much considering its now 4yrs on. *( And for all y'all hating on my ass for saying in that sentence : '' what's wonderful about me...'' um, thanks for the concern, but I couldnt give a f... i'll leave it there, cos I love the kids - and I made my pointhahaha
1. What time did you get up this morning?Way too freakin early considering the obsence time I went to bed after staying up Tues night watching the inauguration, and afterwards texting my Byfriend and my bestest friend in the all the land .And actually Matthew dearest, u were the reason I went to bed technically this morning yet again...(this 'ish has got to stop...haha) So this morning it was about 7.30am when I arose- then it was snooze till 8am- then snooze till 830am-then snooze... Long story short: I got up in the end and went to work for 10am- well 09:57 cos my ass was 3mins early
Yeeeeeey!
2. Diamonds or pearls?I believe the correct phrase is: DIAMONDS OR NOTHINGIt was Raisin in the Sun - the P Diddy, Sanaa Lathan, Phylicia Rashad and Audra McDonald '08 version - and if u have to do anything before u die - get a hold of this masterpiece in Drama. Its complete SPECTACULARITY!!!!! Obviously Puffy is no Sidney Poiter - but the rest of the cast ... its phenomenal - please just see this!!!!
3. What was the last movie you saw?
4. What is your favourite TV show?BROTHERS & SISTERS - and ER. HANDS DOWN- NO CONTEST. The rest of y'all should leave now.
5. What did you have for breakfast?Crunchy Nut- yum yum yum!
6. What is your middle name?
Freakin shocker the 2005 ANSWER still remains....
I was christened 2x ( once in secret from my Dad who didnt want me christened and then again about 3 years later when he finally decided he did want me to be baptised - and it was easier to just christen me again than admit the renegade christening which had taken place 3years prior... Funnier still is that my Dad still doesnt know...) so NOW I have Elizabeth and Joanne as my middle names. Although I also have my confirmation name which is Maria.Now don't we all feel better and more enlightened since I shared that story? hahaha...
7. What is your favorite cuisine?
I said it in '05- and I'll say it again...
Italian, French - gotta love those Frogs Legs- and Chinese, although not neccessarily in that order. ( So I like my food! 'Is that a crime?!...alright then'( CD, that's for u-ha! SB xxx-xxx-x! )
8. What foods do you dislike?
SEE WHAT I MEANT ABOUT CONSISTENCY? Same 'ish , different year....
Surpisingly there are quite a few- but main ones are Indian,Thai and anything too spicy.9. What is your favorite chip flavour?
Yep. yep... still the same...Clearly this is a question for those on the other side of the pond? (Bloody yanks- if I didnt love 'em so much, I'd hate em...ha!)- Us Brits all know 'chip' means Chippy and nowt else love! Haha! But if crisps are what u mean then Salt & Vinegar or Ready Salted.10.What is your favorite CD at the moment?
Finally a question with a different answer...
At the present time, Im switching between Brandy's new joint 'HUMAN' in stores now - pls go get a copy (No seriously please , she needs the sales...) which to borrow a Gigi phrase, is 'Hotter than Stellar' and a mixtape of Ludacris' hottest 16 bars on every record he's been on in 08! Believe me its incredible.And actually just for the nostalgia I had a Mariah 'RAINBOW' album listening party - it was quite nice, cos that is a great album.
11. What kind of car do you drive?
Well if I can be so rude as to reference the as yet unreleased 'So What' by L.Lewis from the ' Expressions of a Dreamer album :
'' I can drive , but being being driven is the way I prefer living...''
AKA: Im still a slave to the bleakest of bleak public transport...
12. Favourite sandwich?
Egg Mayo-which is rather random considering I dont actually like Mayo...
13. What characteristic do you despise?
I loved the '05 answer so much - I had to keep it in!! Apart from using the word 'hate'. (cos I dont hate ANYBODY. I should have said: I'm freaking scared of quiet people. As their silence both confuses and unnerves me....
2005 answer below:
There are many - Let's just start with Dishonesty and end with Ignorance ,although Stupidity is one I'm not particularly fond of and Quietness-yes definitely quietness, I freakin hate quiet people... ( Im kidding, Im kidding -ask anyone who knows me- I love the world...)14. Favourite items of clothing?A toss between my denim mini skirt and my black mini skirt- but like in '05 its definitely a mini skirt
15. If you could go anywhere in the world on holiday, where would you
go?MALDIVES for sure!! Altho...French Polynesia -partcularly Bermuda- is looking quite nice...erm Australia still needs to be done, Would like to do Monte Carlo again loved it there... ALL of the freakin Caribbean too, I mean that's just mandatory... Beverly Hills has needed a visit since Pretty woman came out... Santa Barbara and the Monterey Jazz festival is calling my name, so a trip to South Cali in general may have to be planned.St Tropez, French Riveria - Italian Riveria - in fact anywhere with Riveria in the title is bound to be beautiful so let's stick that in to....hahaha
But Dahling I live to travel and anywhere but here is my main platform... but then which poor person condemned to living in rain-filled and mostly-cold Manchester doesnt subscribe to that way of thinking? ha!
16. What colour is your bathroom?Which one?'' Not bragging - just simply the truth '' - Jay Z ' SO GHETTO'
'05 answerAnd the answer is: the downstairs is white, upstairs is like a white/wooden pine moment.Not really a slave to labels anymore, as it's just like I say:
17. Favourite brands of clothing?
'' if it looks good WEAR IT. If it doesnt PLEASE Don't '
Just because Gucci made it, doesnt mean u look good in itrite? and folks would be wise to bear that in mind, when spending their entire life savings on a pair of shoes, that they cant walk in, which will be out of season next week and dont do anything to accentuate the leg dahling Hahaha
18. Where would you retire to?
Classic '05 answer below still remainsA nice island with a nice beach... it doesnt matter where aslong as they printed my face on the money.19. Favourite time of the day?HOMETIME!!!!!!! Woop! Woop!20. What was your most memorable birthday?
Yep... '05 answer with additionsOoh I have had some really good ones- my 18th was Parties, Meals and then Times Sq, Broadway and New York, my 21st was Parties, meals which went on for a week!Then the fesitivities culminated in a surprise trip to Prague- ( there that bragging again...)but out of them all my favourite was my 7 year old party at Wimpy's (like Mcdonalds for u poor folks who don't know or remember it ) when I wore my Minnie mouse ears and heels! That ensemble was quite historic!
And my T7 girlies just took it to the limit, with my 1/4 of a century bday last yr - from my breakfast in bed, Veuve Cliqueot brunch and my trip to Gary Rhodes restaurant in London - to be then picked up from the trip to be taken for a full body massage... yeah it was quite a stellar 25th b'day in fact!
21. Dream Job?
'05 ANSWER REMAINS -( I'm a consistent mo'fo what can I say? ' Dont say I didnt warn ya '- Jay Z 'No Hook' )
To Act and Sing all day and get paid for it would be quite nice yes, Although I wouldnt say no to being the President of the United States either for like a day...maybe a week...
22. Favourite sport(s) to watch?Basketball baby!! Love the Olympics too just because I love athletes - I mean athletics... ;-) hahahaIn fact a six pack and muscles anytime of the day really, it doesnt even have to be sports related...23 Who do you least expect to send this back to you?My Matt definitely - altho Im sure you'll be quoting back to me the nonsense I said in this thing - long after I send it.
24. Person you expect to send it back first?
Gigi my dearest sister in alllllll of the world - because now u've left my ass for NY and all we have is email communication - u have no freakin choice!! ha!
25. What fabric detergent do you use?
U know sometimes I crack myself up... in which case my '05 answer remains...Oh there's an interesting question.. who in the hell wants to know what detergent I use? I mean what kind of a person wants to know what detergent I use?? I mean really get a freakin life... (and of course its Ariel, what else??)
26. Coke or Pepsi?
Neither really. I dont really touch the stuff anymore cos one tooth extraction is ENOUGH....
But if I get dentures when Im 70 - I'll be straight back on the Coke again- please believe it! haha
27. Are you a morning person or a night owl?
Im an nightbird aslong as no-one is getting my ass up @ 7.30am the next morning...28. What is your shoe size?
Obviously what this 'ish doesnt change in four years ( unless you are seven yrs old) so the 05' answer is the same
I plead the fifth.Okay,Okay, Okay!!!I wear a size 7 but Im 5"8 and if they were any smaller I'd spend my entire life tripping over!Not that Im hung-up about the size of my feet or anything, I just thought u should know...
29. Do you have any pets?
Im happy to report that this '05 answer remains also- which is a huge freakin shocker because the turnover of Pets in my house was unmatched @ one time...Jack my cat is the coolest cat in all the land! and before u ask, yes he does prefer whiskas and the rumours that Love,Love,Jack.com is a website dedicated to him are unfortunately false.30. Any words of wisdom you'd like to share with your friends?
Oooh great a chance to spout completely random nonsense again (Trust me , I was born to do it...) Um, let me think of something poetic, deep, and inspirational!!
I'm thinking....
Stilll thinking...
And Yeah Im still thinking...
Got it
DO: Tell the truth @ all times.
DON'T: Expect that 'ish to pay off in any way shape or form
And remember:
'"Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked.A man reaps what he sows darling."-Galatians 6:7
And yes- I added the darling bit myself
38FF
31. What did you want to be when you were little?
And anyway my Mum tells me I may yet still have a growth spurt, just look what happened to Samantha Fox...
32. What are you doing today?Well Im not collecting the Oscar for Best Actress and the Grammy for Best R&B album, I can tell u that….And all I can say is, its too boring, banal, and monotonous to even type out. Sorry.
Now, Now, folks...
33. Who is the last person you want to see when your life on earth is
over?Someone who loved me unconditionally for who I was -and not for who they wanted me to be...( I cant believe I went all philosopical and meaningful on you - I was trying so hard to keep this 'ish superficial! hahaha )34. What is the farthest this email will travel to reach a friend?N.Y.C. baby!
Dont hate me for sending this nonsense...AGAIN.
AS THE BLAME STILL LIES WITH THE folks that taught u how to read
Love, Light & whatever else your heart desires,
LL xx-XXX-xx
Lauren Lewis
Address: Oh yeah cos I want U to know where I live...
Telephone No: If you know me you have it already...
Telephone No: If you know me you have it already...
Music is a moral law- It gives wings to the mind, A soul to the universe,
Flight to the imagination, A charm to sadness, a life to everything..'
Flight to the imagination, A charm to sadness, a life to everything..'
- Plato
“I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord,
plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future. '' -Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future. '' -Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
Sunday 20 February 2011
hey...
kinda new to this, so if your following me you should know what im gonna put on here, im a singer/songwriter,actress church going family orientated chick & i hate typing so this is all for now;)
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